Stories from the library; or, Found in my storage room

 September 2008

empty fish aquarium (small)
empty lizard terrarium (small)
portable turntable (but no lps)
set of 10 mini rolling pins
authentic native american rain-maker (or so the tag says)
window cling balloons
2 small quilts made of squares children decorated
an old paper bag full of plastic cups
tons more pipe-cleaners than i thought i had
fingerpaint paper (so that's what was in that flat cardboard thing!)
and several lifetime supplies of tracing paper

[Updated October 2011 - I'm STILL using that tracing paper and it has not noticeably diminished]

Stories from the library: Always know your phone number; or, taxidermy and summer reading prizes

August 2008

 So, we had our end-of-summer-reading party last Tuesday. It was very well-attended, only one child broke down in tears, the face-painting was marvelous, and we ate all the cookies.

Next day, I had to call all those whose names were drawn for prizes but weren't present.

One slip said simply "Sophie" and a phone number.

I called the phone number...."Hello! This is the library, Sophie has won a prize!"

Pause.

"Who?"

"Um, Sophie? She won a prize in our summer reading contest?"

"This is a taxidermy shop. There's no Sophie here."

I never did find out who Sophie was.

Stories from the library: I win!

February 2010

 My "I've only read 3 books in my life" kid was back again today....obviously, Alex Rider didn't work for him. Too long. He spends almost every afternoon here - mostly sleeping. "You can't sleep here" I told him firmly. "I'm bored!" he said. "Read a book. There are thousands of books around you." "Reading makes my head hurt." "I will find you a book that does not make your head hurt."

Indiana Jones comics? No.

Josh Elder's Mail Order Ninja. No.

I had to go to storytime. I stuck my head out again....and he was reading Mail Order Ninja.

We all win!

Stories from the library: Happy little moments

 October 2010

This has been one crazy week. So far, we've had three visits from the police, a total program attendance hovering near the 250 mark, a huge glitch in our inventory process, and I've been out for two days. Yes, I took two days of vacation to clean my apartment and put together my new four poster bed from Ikea. Hey, it's a big bed!

In the midst of the craziness, it's nice to remember the small happy moments.

One of my little storytime girls showed up at the library yesterday morning, dressed in pastel leotard, tights, and tiara with her hair in a neat little bun. I asked if she was going to ballet, but no, mom said she was on her way to a princess tea party! Apparently the rest of her costume was in the car. I took a second look at her, and then hastily scooped Ella Bella Ballerina and the Sleeping Beauty by James Mayhew off the shelf. "I think you'll like this." She took one look at the cover - did I mention she looks a bit like Ella Bella? and then her whole face lit up, she shyly took it out of my hands and, clutching it tightly, trotted happily off to the circulation desk. Ella Bella never fails and I love handing it to the shy little girls in pink!

One of my twelve year olds has had his card blocked with fines for a while. I finally sat him down and instructed him to fill out the read off your fines form - NOW. We got his card unblocked and he went off to use the computer...then wandered back. "uh...is that Dragonbreath book on the shelf?" Score! I collected him for our teen (well, middle school) book club in early October and on the books I showed was Dragonbreath - he actually remembered the title and wanted to read it enough to ask about it almost three weeks later! This from a kid who says he "doesn't read at all".

Back to cleaning!

Stories from the library: This is Wednesday; or, Don't eat the daffodils!

May 2013:

This one is worthy of a post all to itself. So, Wednesday. Always a somewhat crazy day. I did storytime in the morning, with no cd player, then ran around like a chicken with its head cut off trying to finish all the other stuff I had to do before I went on the information desk at 2:30 and all the middle schoolers showed up. The following exchanges ensued:

Girls: Ms. Jennifer, we were looking for you, we have something for you!
*They present me with a daffodil*
Me: Aww, thanks
Girls: And you know what, they're edible too!
*produce more daffodils and start EATING THEM*
Me: WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU CRAZY THOSE ARE POISONOUS!!!
Girls: Uh...they are?
Me: I'm pretty sure, most bulbs are.
*Girls race off to bathroom to spit out petals and rinse their mouths with much panicked giggling*

Later...I go upstairs to check on the teen room

Me: Did you girls wash them all out, nobody actually ate any?
Girls: Yeah, we rinsed our mouths. But J ate a whole one.

(J is a high school freshman with poor impulse control, even for the average hs guy. He has just recently been allowed back in the library after being kicked out for an extended period of time b/c he annoyed our director beyond bearing by doing the Harlem Shake on one of our tables)

Me: WHAT
J: Uh...are they really poisonous?
Me: Yes. I googled it.
J: I didn't actually eat it. Much. I rinsed my mouth out.
Me: If you feel sick, go outside. I am not cleaning up vomit again.

Later...director kicks out J and other boys.

*Boys wander out, jostling each other and using inappropriate language (which is probably why they got kicked out in the first place)*
Me: Don't let J go off by himself in case he has convulsions!
Boys: Yeah, sure.
Other patrons: *stare at the crazy librarian*

Then I had a lengthy conversation with the same group of girls about why they had to wear shoes in the library, culminating in my tried and true response "If I have to explain why it's not allowed, you're not mature enough to be in the library by yourself" and I added that we were like a restaurant - no shirt, no shoes, no service. Which was a bad idea b/c they immediately wanted to know how much they had to be wearing for it to qualify as a shirt. I finally just laughed and told them to leave, so they went out and hung out on the back steps of the library, which lead to the staff entrance, so when I was leaving we somehow ended up discussing eating kool-aid and the Cinnamon Test and why we weren't going to do it at the next Middle School Madness.

And that was Wednesday.

[Addendum. Really shouldn't have said that about the no shirt no shoes no service, b/c a bunch of the boys showed up with no shoes on Thursday, reference assistant told them they couldn't come in without shoes, and apparently the girls had passed on what I said and this somehow inspired them to all start stripping off in the lobby. Well, just their shirts, but combining the skinniness of the guys and the fashion in low-riding pants...so I had to go yell at them that THE LOBBY IS NOT A LOCKER GO CHANGE IN THE RESTROOM which is five feet away. Oy. And then we called the police, but that was a different group of teens.]

Stories from the library

Nine-year-old girl: "Oh no, I lost my nail clippers!"
Me: "Why did you bring nail clippers to Mad Scientists Club?"
Girl: "Because they have a tiny knife on them."
Me: "And you need this because...?"
Girl, giving me a look of ultimate scorn, "in case I get kidnapped and tied up and have to cut my way free."
Me: "ah. It's good to be prepared."
Girl: "Yep, that's what I think."

They moved to Montana later - I hope Montana was prepared for the force of nature that was arriving.

Stories from the library

April 2018

Middle schooler: "Why are you always so serious?"
Me, straight face: "Dealing with you has deadened my soul."
Middle schooler: "You came to our school and you were smiling! You looked all excited and happy!"
Me: "That was fake."

Sarcasm is an important communication genre. Also, this middle schooler had been playing weird sound apps on their phone all week and every time I told them to knock it off, they declared I couldn't hear it because the sounds couldn't be heard by old people.